Sarraounia Seidou - Shadowmasks

do i ma[s]k[e]. stories up—how people mask—to justify leaving. those i left behind. maybe they did mean. or. maybe. i mis. remembered. maybe smile meant smile. but. what do smiles mean. maybe birth-givers love me. and bodysnatchers too. and maybe still, still. they wore too many [m]asks. and maybe love should not. mask true faces. and maybe they never learned. to wear enough flesh. or. carve and mold. new flesh over cracked face. around lips. sunken cheekbones. maybe they did not. draw enough. to wear new faces. and maybe. that’s why. so many masks. switched. between seconds. survival skill. above ground. we drift in avatars. wear our truest faces underground. when. game over flashes. on blank screens. black hearses. last week. my lover. this week. my rapist. last month. my stranger. last year. my script. walks by. i throw black hoodie over. glass eyes. 7 hours after we slip against each other. under alexa light. amazon god gives me. artificial yellow. i stroke pantomime mask. latex white. yes, i say. i want it. and god knows. i feel held by this mask. this story. i rush home. and block. rinse sore pelvis bones under hot water. burn off old skin. try again. give spit-stained mirror my skull candy eyes. x-ray selfie. raw story. how i said. n/o\/y\e/s. when my love.r.apist. shadowmask. came. strutting. where i froze. weights section. gym. he wrote. his ending. my number. his smile. too bright. groundnut eyes. his smile did not mean. what smiles should mean. or maybe it did. i ran. dumbbell stack forgotten. maybe paul dunbar (Queue Paul Dunbar’s, We Wear The Mask). prophet or fraud. no matter. maybe he knew. we wear masks inscripted masquerades. play our roles. good citizens. this script. so old. i slut sociopaths. brothers. blade in hand. jut out my wrists. cut right here. right here. go deep. i give them. silicone masks. alibi texts. yes. please. cum here. lie in coffin bed. snowhite syndrome. palindrome frame. storyframe. freezeframe. me-too script. stopwatch. time loop. we switch masks all night. make fuck sound. like love. make fuck sounds. in masks. we take off between grunts. maybe. we move. between scripts. we like that. maybe. no one. everyone. holds blame. maybe. we do not wear true faces since we lost our gods.